Diegetics

A physicist, engineer and a statistician are out hunting. Suddenly, a deer appears 50 yards away.

The physicist does some basic ballistic calculations, assuming a vacuum, lifts his rifle to a specific angle, and shoots. The bullet lands 5 yards short.

The engineer adds a fudge factor for air resistance, lifts his rifle slightly higher, and shoots. The bullet lands 5 yards long.

The statistician yells "We got him!"

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An engineer, a physicist and an economist are the sole survivors from a shipwreck, washed ashore onto a desert island. A can of beans also comes ashore with them - all that keeps them from starvation.

The engineer finds a pebble to try to open the can - fails. The physicist tries to start a fire with driftwood to heat the can to make it easier to open - fails. In desperation, they turn to the economist.

"Can you open the can for us?"

"Easy. First, assume that we have a can opener..."

Re demographics, the trouble with having a replacement level family is that last 0.1 of a child is a bitch (as was the 0.2 of a dog)

Two neutrinos go through a bar ...